Emerging Stronger: How Addiction Teaches Us 5 Core Strengths of the Human Condition
When I tell people that I’m an Addiction Psychiatrist, the usual response is “Oh man. That must be tough.” But with a front row view into this complex disease, I’ve learned that the journey of Addiction often reveals unexpected, undervalued core strengths of the human condition. Patients struggling with the most severe forms of addiction are also some of the most resilient people I know. But we constantly underestimate these folks. We miscalculate their determination. We minimize their drive. We dismiss their intelligence. We disregard their perseverance. Society at large views folks with severe addiction as weak, dirty, lazy- somehow “less than” them. Think brown paper bags, skid row, dirty needles. When I told my medical school mentor that I wanted to do an addiction psychiatry fellowship, he simply said, “Are you sure you want to treat…them folks?” Turns out, “them folks” are the hidden warriors of the world. In my humble observations, there are five core strengths those suffering from Addiction often develop and refine:
5. Never Give Up
Folks suffering with addiction face the potential for monumental daily setbacks. The threat of a return to substances or alcohol is a constant dark demon that permeates their very existence, keeps their loved ones up at night. A return to substances or alcohol is a constant, real possibility that can result in catastrophic consequences, including loss of job, finances, relationships, and even loss of life. Those suffering with severe addiction understand these odds better than most. They never give up working to beat them.
4. Gratitude
People struggling with substance use disorders learn the hard way to be thankful for little things that the rest of the world overlooks. I once had a patient call me at Christmas, saying excitedly, “Dr. Grawert! I have two Christmas presents under the tree for my children this year!” This patient had five children under the age of five. I imagined a small Christmas tree with five little ones frantically fighting over two gifts on Christmas morning, wrapping paper flying. Yet I could sense the pride and positivity in her voice through the phone. Puzzled, I listened and waited for more. She continued, “Last year I sold all of their presents to pay my dealer. That ain’t gonna happen this year.” Little things.
3. Mind Body Connection
In a twenty first century that blankets us in smart phone alerts, TV screens, and processed, ready to eat food, it’s easy for us to forget that we are indeed animals, still guided by a bodily river of pheromones, dopamine, melatonin, and epinephrine. These bodily chemicals have a profound influence over our daily behavior, the power of which is hard to comprehend unless you suffer from addiction. Alcohol and drugs are super-releasers of the pleasure hormone dopamine. Folks who struggle with these substances painfully understand how even subtle reminders of their drug of choice can cause powerful instantaneous physical and mental cravings. It is their daily reminder of how strong the mind-body connection truly is.
2. Human Fragility
I once had a 15-year-old girl whose first words to me at our initial appointment were, “All of my friends and family are dead.” She went on to describe in painstaking detail how each close friend and family member had passed away from an unintentional overdose within the past two years. She was orphaned and friendless by age 15. Another patient of mine who survived multiple near fatal overdoses once smiled at me and said, “I’m a cat whose about ten lives over his nine-life limit.” Folks who suffer from addiction have very real daily reminders of how fleeting and fragile our human condition truly is. The AA community says, “Easy does it” as a somber reminder not to overestimate confidence in your physical condition or sobriety. I’m 40 years old. I’m lucky enough that I haven’t had a single close friend pass away yet. Not one. Both of my parents are alive. Both of my siblings are alive. On the other hand, I have witnessed innumerable losses of patients from the devastating disease of addiction. It is a constant reminder that our time on this earth is indeed fleeting, and very precious.
1. Our secret superpower: Human Connection
The disease of addiction is a powerful tour de force. You never conquer it. You live with it. Those who suffer with it quickly learn that the secret superpower for battling this disease is human connection and support. Addiction is a disease that thrives in solitude and weakens with numbers. During the pandemic, we were forced to isolate from others. As a consequence, addiction numbers skyrocketed. Herein lies the magic and power of AA, NA (Narcotics Anonymous), and GA (Gamblers Anonymous). These support groups provide the power of human company to conquer the seemingly unconquerable. They provide verbal, physical, and emotional bolstering from those who understand when understanding is needed most. Those who are close to addiction understand just how essential human connection truly is to overcoming significant life adversity. It’s not optional. It’s our fundamental ingredient to success.
Albert Einstein famously said, “In the middle of every great crisis lies great opportunity.” Addiction is a damaging disease whose sufferers are often deeply misunderstood. If you can peer through the pain though, this disease also offers us a profound gift: the gift of understanding what makes us humans truly great. The fuel for the rocket boosters. The ultimate gasoline. The secret sauce. The polish and shine hidden beneath the rust. And what a wild, beautiful ride this life can be.
Dr. Grawert is an Addiction Psychiatrist and the Chief Medical Officer at Aware Recovery Care. Located in 11 states across the east coast, Aware Recovery Care offers robust in person and virtual treatment options for substance use disorders, including MAT and virtual detox from the home. If you or someone you love is suffering with alcohol or substance abuse, check out the resources at Aware Recovery Care today.
https://www.awarerecoverycare.com/